H50 Fic - In My Time of Dying
Oct. 24th, 2011 05:59 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
shinysylverTitle: In My Time of Dying
Author:![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
shinysylver
Artist:kymericl
Vidder:forcellari
Fandom: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Characters/Pairing: Steve/Danny, Grace
Word Count: 5371
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I don't own Hawaii Five-0.
Warning: graphic violence, death of canon characters, suicidal ideation
Summary: When Steve is infected by the virus he loses hope but Danny refuses to let him die. No matter what Steve thinks, Danny knows that he will fight off the fever and survive...even though none of the others did.
Author's Note: This was written for this year's![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
zombiebang. Thank you to forcellari and somehowunbrokenfor being awesome betas! The title is from the song "Time of Dying" by Three Days Grace.
Author's Note: Check out all of the great art bykymericl here and be sure to leave her lots of love.
Author's Note: The amazingforcellari betaed this fic and was inspired to create a prequel video. It is a perfect lead up to the fic. Be sure to let her know what you think here.
Danny shook his head firmly. “No, I won’t do it. You’re crazier than I thought if you think I would ever--”
“You have to,” Steve interrupted. He struggled to sit up, trying and failing until Danny reached out and cupped his elbow with a strong hand and helped him lean against the wall. He took a deep breath. “Think about Grace.”
“I am,” Danny said gently as he carefully unwound the makeshift bandage on Steve’s forearm and inspected the wound. “It looks like it’s healing.”
Steve refused to look. Danny wanted to think that he was healing, that he would be okay, but Steve knew better. “Please,” he gasped, wincing as Danny re-wrapped the bandage tightly. He reached out and grabbed Danny’s arm. “Danny, please. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t,” Danny said confidently.
Steve shook his head. “You can’t know that.”
“Steve, I know you,” Danny said simply. “And there is no way I’m going to kill you.”
**
One Week Earlier
Danny grasped Grace’s hand tighter as he led her around a corpse on the street. He gave it a wide berth. After all, it may look dead, but you never could be too safe these days. At first, when this whole thing had started, he had done his best to shield Grace's eyes, trying to keep her from seeing the death all around them. But he didn’t bother any longer, not since they’d almost been killed because he was too busy watching her to see the zombie in the alley. Thankfully, Steve had seen it coming in time.
Danny glanced back at Steve, letting his eyes linger for a moment. Steve was following a few yards behind Danny and Grace, watching their backs. He looked rough, his clothes dirty and torn. Over one shoulder, he was carrying a blood-covered baseball bat. The bat had fast become his favorite weapon because it could destroy a head easily without wasting their ammunition.
Steve met Danny’s eyes and gave him a small, tight smile before turning his attention back to the buildings on either side of the road. Danny knew that Steve had to be exhausted, even more so than Danny was, because no matter how often Danny protested, Steve always took the majority of the night watch on their trips out. However, despite his obvious weariness, Steve’s eyes never once paused in their alert scanning of the terrain.
Danny readjusted the strap of the heavy food bag he was carrying and turned back to the road ahead of them. Despite everything that had happened, all of the horrors that they had witnessed, Danny took comfort in Steve’s constant presence. He knew that he and Grace would have never made it this far without Steve. Hell, he probably never would have gotten to Grace in the first place without Steve.
“Danno?” Grace asked quietly, tugging at his arm.
“Yeah?” he replied, looking down at her dirt-streaked face.
“I need to tie my shoes,” she said, pointing at her feet with her free hand.
Danny followed her finger and saw that her laces weren’t just untied; they had somehow managed to work themselves free of several eyelets. He sighed and glanced around them quickly. It seemed quiet enough so he let go of Grace’s hand, set down the bag of food, and bent down to begin working on her right shoe while she tackled her left.
He was so focused on finishing the task at hand quickly that he lost track of his surroundings until Grace screamed. It was a loud, shrill sound full of fear that, as a father, he'd hoped never to hear. His heart racing, he turned quickly, keeping his body in front of Grace and saw that the bloated corpse they had just passed had roused and was now bearing down on them fast, too fast.
He didn't have time to get his gun up and didn't have time to run. All he could do was hope that the creature would be distracted enough by him that Steve could get to Grace. Danny closed his eyes, waiting for the inevitable impact when suddenly, there was a loud thwack. He opened his eyes and saw Steve standing over the zombie, bat in hand. Danny glanced down long enough to see that, yes, the head was a crushed, gooey mess of bone and brain, before looking back at Steve. “Thank you.”
Steve nodded curtly. “They’ll have heard the scream. We have to get out of here.”
Danny picked up Grace--they could fix her shoes later--and turned back to Steve. “Lead the way.”
Steve took off at a light jog, dodging around abandoned cars and heaps of trash. He moved quickly, but Danny knew that he was holding back for Danny’s sake and he did his best to keep up with Grace clinging tightly to his neck.
"I'm sorry," Grace whispered frantically in his ear. "I shouldn't have screamed. I know better. Danno, I'm sorry."
"Shhh," Danny soothed, between gasped breaths. "It's not your fault, Monkey. Not your fault."
They made it three blocks before they were intercepted by five of the creatures. Danny pulled up short and tried not to look too closely at what had probably once been a lovely family with a mother, father and three teenage children. Instead he searched for an escape route even though he knew it was too late. There was no way that they would be able to outrun the beasts, not five of them. Not for the first time, Danny wished that Hollywood hadn’t been so very, very wrong when they'd made all of those movies about slow-moving zombies.
“Go!” Steve yelled, glancing back at Danny. “Get Grace out of here.”
“No!” Danny yelled back. “Not without you.”
“Just go! I’ll follow when I can!”
Danny stared at Steve helplessly for a moment before cursing under his breath and taking off down a side street. Steve was right, he had to get Grace to safety, but it went against everything that he was to leave Steve behind.
“What about Uncle Steve?” Grace asked desperately, beginning to cry. “We can’t leave him.”
Grace began clawing at his back, her nails digging in painfully as she tried to squirm free. She was wriggling so much that he had to stop or risk dropping her, so he pulled up and took a deep breath. He made quiet hushing noises and patted her back as he thought.
She was right, of course. He'd never forgive himself if they left Steve, and neither would she. Grace had lost so much already that he didn't know if she could bear losing Steve too. To be honest, he didn't know if he could either. Besides, Steve would never, ever leave them if the situations were reversed.
He looked around, quickly scanning their surroundings, and saw an alcove under a porch that would be nearly hidden from most angles. After a quick inspection, he decided it would be safe enough for a short time and set Grace down. He pulled up his pants leg, took his back-up gun out of his ankle holster, and handed it carefully to Grace. “You remember how to use it?”
She nodded solemnly, keeping the barrel pointed carefully at the ground.
“Good,” Danny said. He pointed under the porch. “You hide in there and if anybody comes besides me or Steve, you shoot them in the head. Do you understand?”
She nodded again and he quickly pressed a kiss to her forehead before running back in the direction they'd come from. He hated leaving her and hated that he'd had to teach her how to shoot, but desperate times called for desperate measures, and so he had taught her how to survive if something happened to him.
As he ran, Danny pulled his gun out of his shoulder holster and made sure it was loaded. He only had a handful of bullets left so he was going to have to make them count.
Danny was filled with dread as he got closer to Steve. He didn't know how long it had been since they had left Steve, but one man against five of those damned beasts was bad odds, even if that man was Steve. Steeling himself for what he would find, he turned the last corner, gun extended in front of him. He was relieved to see Steve was still on his feet, circling two zombies with his bat in hand. The other three zombies were down, their brains smeared across the pavement.
Danny slowed his pace as he walked toward Steve trying to get a clear shot at one of the beasts. "Steve!"
Steve glanced up in surprise at Danny's voice. Danny had intended to let Steve know help had arrived but unfortunately he realized his mistake too late. Steve was only distracted for a second but it was enough for the female zombie to lunge forward and grab his arm. Danny watched in horror as the woman sank her teeth deep into Steve's arm, making him drop the bat.
"No!" Danny yelled. He ran forward, firing his gun at both of the zombies. Before he realized what he was doing, he had emptied his clip into the creatures. He had managed to force them away from Steve but unfortunately none of the bullets had hit their heads so instead of going down, they started to move warily towards Danny.
"You idiot!" Steve exclaimed. He reached down, picked up the bat he'd dropped, and rushed forward, swinging it two-handed. He managed to efficiently crush both zombie skulls in one swing before he winced, dropped the bat and grabbing at his bleeding arm. "We're almost out of ammunition. You shouldn't have wasted it."
"You were bit," Danny explained helplessly.
"Doesn't matter," Steve said. He took off his outer shirt and tied it tightly around his bleeding arm. He looked up suddenly. "Where's Grace?"
"I got her hidden away before I came back," Danny replied numbly as he stared at the blood slowly staining Steve's makeshift bandage.
"You shouldn't have come back." Steve said quietly.
"Leaving you wasn't an option, babe,” Danny said shaking his head. He tore his eyes away from Steve's arm. "How bad is it?"
Steve shrugged. "She bit me. You know as well as I do what that means."
Danny closed his eyes. This was his fault. If only he hadn't yelled out for Steve, distracting him, then--
"Stop that," Steve muttered. "It's not your fault. It just happened."
Danny knew better than to argue with Steve. Now wasn't the time for that. Instead he moved forward and took hold of Steve's good arm. "Come on. We should get back to Grace."
Steve pulled back, breaking Danny's grip and stared at Danny like he was crazy. "Danny, did you miss the part where I was bit?"
Danny met Steve's eyes with a determined gaze and reached out, taking Steve's wrist. "Did you miss the part where leaving you wasn't an option?"
"But--"
Danny pulled Steve down into a fierce kiss. "No buts."
**
Danny slipped out of the cellar, intending to retrieve some supplies from the kitchen.
"Danno?" Grace asked quietly from the couch as he passed through the living room. "Is Uncle Steve going to be okay?"
Danny sighed and sat down next to Grace. He hadn't let her go in to see Steve since they had made it back to the relative safety of Steve's house three days ago. Thankfully, the worst of Steve’s fever hadn't hit until they were nearly home. Danny had all but carried Steve the last several blocks when he'd become delirious and non-responsive but they had made it. Steve’s condition had forced Danny to lock him in the cellar just in case he lost his battle with the virus. He had faith in Steve but he still had to protect Grace. "I hope so, Monkey."
"But when Tommy's dad got bit..." Grace trailed off and stared at her feet.
"Hey," Danny said wrapping his arm around her shoulder and pulling her close. "Steve is the strongest person I know. And besides, before the news went dark there was a story about a man in Atlanta who fought it off and a woman in New York. If they can do it, then he can too."
"What if he doesn't?" Grace asked, her voice trembling.
"We can't think like that," Danny said firmly. "Steve is sick and we have to be strong for him until he gets better. Do you think you can be strong for him?"
Grace nodded and wiped fiercely at her eyes. "I can be strong just like Uncle Steve."
"I know you can." Danny squeezed her gently.
"Danno?" she asked quietly. "Can I help take care of him? It's my fault that he's sick and--"
"Hey," Danny interrupted. "None of that. It's not your fault that he's sick. You didn't do anything wrong."
She frowned at him. "I still want to help."
"And you can," Danny said. "You can help gather the first aid supplies and wash the bandages and--"
"But I want to see him," she insisted.
"Grace, I'm sorry but you can't see him until he's better," he told her firmly. "Now why don't you go find a book for us to read after I check on Steve?"
Grace glared at him but did as she was told, getting up to search Steve's bookshelves for something worth reading. Most of the books weren't appropriate for children, but Danny wanted to keep her mind active. If the only options were Steve's military strategy books or Mary's Harlequin romance novels, well, Grace would be an expert in troop deployment in no time.
He watched her for a moment before standing up to get some fresh water and a clean cloth from the kitchen. When he got into the cellar, Steve was tossing and turning on the pallet Danny had set up for him. Danny sat down next to him and took the washcloth, dipped it into the bowl of cool water, and gently wiped at Steve's brow. "Shhh. It's okay. You're okay."
Still sleeping, Steve reached out toward Danny's voice and Danny took Steve's hand in his own. He didn't know if it was his touch or the cool cloth, but Steve calmed and relaxed into a deeper sleep. Danny set the cloth aside and studied Steve's face. It had been three days and Steve was still fighting. Chin had succumbed to the virus after one day and Kono after two.
Danny didn't like to think about Chin and Kono. They had been lost in the early days of the epidemic, before they had disbanded the task force. Everyone had been so hopeful that they could help maintain order until a cure was found, but it had been a lost cause. Chin had gone first, bitten while he tried to help evacuate the hospital. Kono had seen it happen and had flown into a rage trying to reach him. She had taken out three of the beasts but had been bitten in the process. Steve and Danny had sat by their sides hoping that they would be able to fight the infection, but once they had changed, Steve did what had been necessary to put them out of their misery. He'd insisted that the burden was his as the leader of the task force, refusing to let Danny share the weight.
Danny gently squeezed Steve's hand. Steve had to get better because Danny didn't know if he was strong enough to look into Steve's eyes and pull the trigger. And he knew he wasn't strong enough to keep going on his own.
**
He was hungry. So bone deep hungry that he couldn't think of anything else. The hunger took over all that he was, all that he had ever been, and all that he would be. It reached into his soul and ripped it out until there was nothing left but a mindless desire to consume. He moved forward, trying to find something, anything, to sate the hunger.
Steve jerked awake, disoriented. He forced his eyes open and was met with darkness. He tried to sit up, but as soon as he lifted his head, he felt dizzy and he fell back against the pillow. Pillow. There was a pillow. That was a good sign. He wasn't sure where he was, but he'd never known a kidnapper to give out luxuries like pillows.
He strained his brain and tried to remember what had happened. He reached up with his hand to rub at his temple which made his arm throb painfully. The ache in his arm brought back a rush of memories. They had been running and then there had been five zombies. And then he'd been bit. He didn't remember much after that, just that Danny and Grace had been there and they had run. After that, his memory got hazy, just a vague feeling of strong arms wrapped around him and whispered assurances.
"Danny?" he croaked. His throat was too dry to yell, but Danny must have been close, because Steve heard a door open almost immediately.
"Hey," Danny said, flipping on the lights. "How are you feeling?"
Steve groaned as the lights pierced his eyes, making his head ache. "Thirsty."
Danny left for a moment and returned to kneel at his side with a bottle of water. Danny carefully wrapped his arm around Steve's shoulders and helped him lean forward enough to sip from the bottle. Steve had trouble swallowing and even with Danny's help most of the water dribbled out of his mouth and down his chin, but he was grateful for the little bit that managed to slide down his swollen throat.
"There you go," Danny said, setting the bottle aside. "I'll give you more in a minute. Lemme just check your arm first."
Steve looked away as Danny unwound the cloth around his arm and changed the bandage. "How long?"
"Five days," Danny said, grinning at him. "You've made it five days, babe."
Steve couldn't force himself to return Danny's smile. Five days was longer than anyone else they'd heard of but that didn't mean anything. The bone deep hunger of the dream was still fresh in his mind and he wasn't under any illusions that he would survive this. "Danny," he said softly. "You shouldn't have waited this long. It'll only be harder the longer you wait."
Danny frowned at him but didn't say anything until he finished re-wrapping Steve’s arm. Once he was done, he laid the back of his hand against Steve's forehead. "The fever's almost gone. You are going to be fine. Now, are you hungry? We don't have a lot but there are some nice--"
"No!" Steve yelled as loudly as he could with his raw throat. The idea of food, of eating, made something dark wake up inside him and he didn't trust himself.
"You need to eat something," Danny said.
"I will, just not now. My stomach is upset," Steve said. It wasn't exactly a lie. His stomach was upset, but he knew it was from hunger, not nausea.
"Okay no food," Danny agreed. "But I'll bring down some tea for your stomach and maybe a few crackers. Does that sound okay?"
Steve nodded. Tea and crackers should be safe.
**
The next day, Steve watched as Danny bustled around the cellar re-organizing the canned goods that he’d already alphabetized once before. He let his eyes follow Danny, trying to remember every detail. If he was going to die, he wanted Danny to be there at the end. It was selfish, he knew that, but he wanted to be near Danny for as long as he could.
Steve sighed and tried to clear his thoughts. Thinking like that was only going to make it harder.
“Why the long face?” Danny asked, turning around at Steve’s sigh.
“A zombie apocalypse isn’t enough of a reason?” Steve asked, trying for levity.
Danny rolled his eyes and came over to sit next to Steve. He reached out and squeezed Steve’s thigh fondly, letting his hand linger. “From where I’m sitting, things are looking up. We got Grace and you’re getting better and—what? What’s that face?”
“Danny," Steve said quietly. "It's been long enough. You have to kill me before it’s too late."
Danny shook his head firmly. “No, I won’t do it. You’re crazier than I thought if you think I would ever--”
“You have to,” Steve interrupted. He struggled to sit up, trying and failing until Danny reached out and cupped his elbow with a strong hand and helped him lean against the wall. He took a deep breath. “Think about Grace.”
“I am,” Danny said gently as he carefully unwound the makeshift bandage on Steve’s forearm and inspected the wound. “It looks like it’s healing.”
Steve refused to look. Danny wanted to think that he was healing, that he would be okay, but Steve knew better. “Please,” he gasped, wincing as Danny re-wrapped the bandage tightly. He reached out and grabbed Danny’s arm. “Danny, please. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t,” Danny said confidently.
Steve shook his head. “You can’t know that.”
“Steve, I know you,” Danny said simply. “And there is no way I’m going to kill you.”
"You don't understand!" Steve yelled desperately.
“What don’t I understand?” Danny asked, concerned.
Steve looked away. He didn’t want to tell Danny, but he needed him to understand. "I dream about it."
"It?" Danny asked.
"The hunger," Steve explained, refusing to meet Danny's eyes. "Every night it's worse. All I want to do is eat, but not like a normal person. Like one of them."
Danny took Steve's hand in his own. "But it's only in your dreams right, babe?"
"Yes, no, I don't know." He slid down the wall until he was leaning against Danny. "There's something different. Damn it, Danny, it scares me. Do you understand that?"
Danny shifted around so that he could put an arm around Steve's shoulders. "Yeah, I get it, but Steve, you survived this. Your arm is almost healed and I think that if you would just eat something besides crackers--wait a minute." Danny turned his head to study Steve's eyes. "Are you not eating because of the dreams?"
Steve shrugged and looked away.
"Steve, you have to eat something," Danny insisted, pulling away. "I'm going to go make you something. I'm sure you'll feel better after."
Danny stood up and left the room. Steve waited to make sure he was really gone before he lifted his shaking hand to study Danny's gun. He felt a little guilty for stealing the gun while Danny had tried to comfort him, but if Danny couldn't do this then he would. He would take this burden onto himself to save Danny the pain the same way he had with Chin and Kono.
**
Danny opened a can of tuna and carefully spooned the contents onto a plate next to some crackers. He was glad that they still had enough food even though he'd had to leave the supply bag behind on their last, ill-fated trip out. Unfortunately, they didn’t have any mayo to make an actual tuna salad; everything that required refrigeration had long since spoiled, but the tuna would be protein.
Steve was wasting away and Danny hated watching it. It had only been a week but already Steve’s hard muscle was disappearing. And worse than that was Steve’s emotional state. Danny didn’t know how much longer he could keep smiling in the face of Steve’s depression.
He felt a burning in his eyes and leaned against the counter breathing deeply. Steve was better. Danny knew he was better. He just wished that he could convince Steve of it.
“Daddy?” Grace asked from behind him. “Are you okay?”
Danny straightened and pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes, rubbing fiercely before he turned around. “Yeah, Monkey, I’m fine. I was just fixing Steve some dinner.”
“Can I take it to him?” Grace asked, coming over to look at the plate of food. “You said that I could see him when he was better.”
Danny began opening a can of cut pineapple to avoid having to answer immediately. Steve wasn’t in a good place right now, but maybe seeing Grace would help. In fact, Steve would probably be more willing to eat if Grace were watching. It was worth a try at least. He put a scoop of pineapple onto the plate and handed it to Grace. “I think that’s a good idea. You can take him his dinner.”
“Okay,” she said excitedly.
He watched her leave the room before turning around to clean up. He had only managed to wash the spoon when he heard Grace scream.
**
Steve put the safety back on the gun and shoved it behind his back. “Shhh…it’s okay, Grace. I’m sorry.”
Grace stopped screaming but was still crying softly. She fell to her knees and picked up the plate she'd dropped, scooping the spilled crackers off of the floor. “Daddy said I could bring you dinner. He said you were better.”
Steve tried to get up and go to her but he was too weak to stand. He had been so close. Another minute more and she would have found his body. He banged his head against the wall. “Gracie, I’m so sorry.”
“What’s going on?” Danny yelled, running into the room. “Grace, are you okay? What happened?”
Grace shook her head and thrust the plate of food into his hands before running out of the room.
Danny turned to Steve. “What happened?”
“I…” Steve started. He closed his eyes and pulled the gun out from behind his back. No matter what happened he knew he couldn’t use it. Not now. Not after he’d seen the look of terrified horror on Grace’s face.
“What? Is that--Steve. What are you doing with my gun?” Danny asked in a cold voice.
Steve sighed. “I was going to do what you couldn’t, but Grace interrupted me.”
“Damn it!” Danny yelled and Steve heard a loud thud. He opened his eyes and watched as Danny clutched his hand to his chest, a long crack in the door where he had hit it. “When are you going to get it through your head that you’re okay?”
Danny marched across the room, knelt down, and roughly grabbed Steve’s injured arm. He pulled it out and tore off the bandages. Steve winced at the rough treatment and closed his eyes.
“Oh no you don’t!” Danny growled. He shook Steve’s arm. “Look at it. Or are you too much of a coward?”
Steve’s eyes snapped open at the taunt. He wasn’t a coward. He’d never been a coward and the fact that Danny would call him that made him angry. Steve glared at Danny before he lowered his eyes to his arm, steeling himself to see the same oozing blackness that had devoured Chin and Kono’s wounds. Instead he saw healthy pink skin. It wasn’t healed yet, but Danny was right, it was healing.
“Do you see?” Danny asked softly.
Steve nodded mutely, staring at his arm. He reached out with his free hand and gently pressed at the edge of the wound. He really was going to be okay. “I’m going to be okay?” he asked in wonder.
Danny let go of his arm and cupped Steve’s head, pulling him close. “Yes.”
Steve let himself collapse against Danny, burrowing his head into the crook of Danny’s neck. “But what about the dreams? They felt so real.”
“I don’t know,” Danny said hugging Steve close to him. “They might just have been your fear or they might have been real. But either way, you’re okay now. Do you understand? And if you ever try to leave me again—“
Danny’s voice caught and he stopped talking, instead pressing several kisses to the top of Steve’s head.
“I won’t,” Steve promised kissing Danny’s neck. He couldn’t believe he’d almost killed himself and left Danny and Grace for no reason. If Grace hadn’t come in—Steve jerked his head up. “Grace! She saw me with the gun in my mouth.”
“I need to go talk to her.” Danny pulled away and stood up. He picked up the gun and looked at Steve. “You aren’t going to—“
“No,” Steve said firmly.
“Good,” Danny said. “But Steve, I just want you to know that if you ever do something that stupid again…if you ever scare Grace like that again…”
“I know,” Steve said.
Steve watched Danny leave the room before picking up the abandoned plate of food and forcing himself to eat a bite of tuna. If he wanted to get out of this cellar he was going to have to get his strength back. He had managed to eat half of the food on the plate when he heard quiet footsteps and looked up to find Grace peeking hesitantly around the side of the door.
“Hey,” he said softly.
She looked at him for a moment before entering the room and sitting down next to him. “Danno said you were so sick you weren’t thinking right.”
“He’s right,” Steve said. “Gracie, I’m so sorry you saw that.”
“Are you thinking right now?” she asked.
“Yeah,” he replied. “Yeah, I am. What you saw is never going to happen again.”
“Good,” Grace said. She lunged forward and threw her arms around him. “Because I don’t want you to go away like Mommy and Stan and Chin and Kono.”
Steve wrapped his arms around her and rested his chin on her forehead. He looked up at the door and saw Danny standing there watching. “I’m not going anywhere. Danno and I aren’t going anywhere.”
“Okay, Monkey,” Danny said. “It’s time for you to get ready for bed. I’ll be up to read to you in a minute.”
Grace pulled away and kissed Steve’s forehead before she left the room. Steve watched her leave before looking up at Danny.
“So,” Danny said. “I was wondering if you wanted to come to bed tonight?”
“You’ll have to help me,” Steve said, ashamed of his weakness. He felt stronger after having eaten but still didn’t think he could walk on his own.
“Always.” Danny walked over and pulled Steve to his feet. He slung Steve’s arm over his shoulder and started moving slowly toward the door.
Steve was exhausted by the time they had finally made it up the two flights of stairs. He collapsed gratefully onto the bed while Danny went to read to Grace. He must have dozed off because when he woke up Danny was in bed next to him, one arm wrapped tightly around his waist.
Steve rolled over and saw that Danny was still wide awake. “Hey.”
Danny leaned forward and kissed him gently. “Hey.”
“Is Grace okay?” Steve asked.
“As well as she can be,” Danny replied. “She’s lost so much and seen so much. I keep waiting for the day when it’s all too much for her, but she’s strong.”
“She takes after you,” Steve said.
Danny shook his head. “I’m not that strong.”
“Yeah you are,” Steve said. “You came back for me and you believed in me when I didn’t.”
“I had to,” Danny said. “I can’t do this without you. Besides, I know you, and you are one stubborn SOB. There is no way you were going to let a little zombie bite get the better of you.”
Steve smiled and leaned in for another kiss. “Thank you.”
Danny kissed him, letting his lips linger a moment. “If you really want to thank me you’ll take a bath tomorrow. You stink.”
Steve laughed. “Noted.”
“Now go to sleep,” Danny ordered. “You need your rest.”
“Yes, sir,” Steve said rolling back over and closing his eyes. He felt Danny shift closer to him, pressing his warm body against Steve’s back. As Steve drifted off he could almost forget all of the bad things. He'd lost so much, they all had, but they still had each other. He didn’t know what tomorrow would hold, but right now, in this moment, things were good.
Author:
shinysylverArtist:
kymericl Vidder:
forcellariFandom: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Characters/Pairing: Steve/Danny, Grace
Word Count: 5371
Rating: R
Disclaimer: I don't own Hawaii Five-0.
Warning: graphic violence, death of canon characters, suicidal ideation
Summary: When Steve is infected by the virus he loses hope but Danny refuses to let him die. No matter what Steve thinks, Danny knows that he will fight off the fever and survive...even though none of the others did.
Author's Note: This was written for this year's
zombiebang. Thank you to forcellari and somehowunbrokenfor being awesome betas! The title is from the song "Time of Dying" by Three Days Grace.Author's Note: Check out all of the great art by
kymericl here and be sure to leave her lots of love.Author's Note: The amazing
forcellari betaed this fic and was inspired to create a prequel video. It is a perfect lead up to the fic. Be sure to let her know what you think here.
Those Who Are Dead from forcellari on Vimeo.
Danny shook his head firmly. “No, I won’t do it. You’re crazier than I thought if you think I would ever--”
“You have to,” Steve interrupted. He struggled to sit up, trying and failing until Danny reached out and cupped his elbow with a strong hand and helped him lean against the wall. He took a deep breath. “Think about Grace.”
“I am,” Danny said gently as he carefully unwound the makeshift bandage on Steve’s forearm and inspected the wound. “It looks like it’s healing.”
Steve refused to look. Danny wanted to think that he was healing, that he would be okay, but Steve knew better. “Please,” he gasped, wincing as Danny re-wrapped the bandage tightly. He reached out and grabbed Danny’s arm. “Danny, please. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t,” Danny said confidently.
Steve shook his head. “You can’t know that.”
“Steve, I know you,” Danny said simply. “And there is no way I’m going to kill you.”
**
One Week Earlier
Danny grasped Grace’s hand tighter as he led her around a corpse on the street. He gave it a wide berth. After all, it may look dead, but you never could be too safe these days. At first, when this whole thing had started, he had done his best to shield Grace's eyes, trying to keep her from seeing the death all around them. But he didn’t bother any longer, not since they’d almost been killed because he was too busy watching her to see the zombie in the alley. Thankfully, Steve had seen it coming in time.
Danny glanced back at Steve, letting his eyes linger for a moment. Steve was following a few yards behind Danny and Grace, watching their backs. He looked rough, his clothes dirty and torn. Over one shoulder, he was carrying a blood-covered baseball bat. The bat had fast become his favorite weapon because it could destroy a head easily without wasting their ammunition.
Steve met Danny’s eyes and gave him a small, tight smile before turning his attention back to the buildings on either side of the road. Danny knew that Steve had to be exhausted, even more so than Danny was, because no matter how often Danny protested, Steve always took the majority of the night watch on their trips out. However, despite his obvious weariness, Steve’s eyes never once paused in their alert scanning of the terrain.
Danny readjusted the strap of the heavy food bag he was carrying and turned back to the road ahead of them. Despite everything that had happened, all of the horrors that they had witnessed, Danny took comfort in Steve’s constant presence. He knew that he and Grace would have never made it this far without Steve. Hell, he probably never would have gotten to Grace in the first place without Steve.
“Danno?” Grace asked quietly, tugging at his arm.
“Yeah?” he replied, looking down at her dirt-streaked face.
“I need to tie my shoes,” she said, pointing at her feet with her free hand.
Danny followed her finger and saw that her laces weren’t just untied; they had somehow managed to work themselves free of several eyelets. He sighed and glanced around them quickly. It seemed quiet enough so he let go of Grace’s hand, set down the bag of food, and bent down to begin working on her right shoe while she tackled her left.
He was so focused on finishing the task at hand quickly that he lost track of his surroundings until Grace screamed. It was a loud, shrill sound full of fear that, as a father, he'd hoped never to hear. His heart racing, he turned quickly, keeping his body in front of Grace and saw that the bloated corpse they had just passed had roused and was now bearing down on them fast, too fast.
He didn't have time to get his gun up and didn't have time to run. All he could do was hope that the creature would be distracted enough by him that Steve could get to Grace. Danny closed his eyes, waiting for the inevitable impact when suddenly, there was a loud thwack. He opened his eyes and saw Steve standing over the zombie, bat in hand. Danny glanced down long enough to see that, yes, the head was a crushed, gooey mess of bone and brain, before looking back at Steve. “Thank you.”
Steve nodded curtly. “They’ll have heard the scream. We have to get out of here.”
Danny picked up Grace--they could fix her shoes later--and turned back to Steve. “Lead the way.”
Steve took off at a light jog, dodging around abandoned cars and heaps of trash. He moved quickly, but Danny knew that he was holding back for Danny’s sake and he did his best to keep up with Grace clinging tightly to his neck.
"I'm sorry," Grace whispered frantically in his ear. "I shouldn't have screamed. I know better. Danno, I'm sorry."
"Shhh," Danny soothed, between gasped breaths. "It's not your fault, Monkey. Not your fault."
They made it three blocks before they were intercepted by five of the creatures. Danny pulled up short and tried not to look too closely at what had probably once been a lovely family with a mother, father and three teenage children. Instead he searched for an escape route even though he knew it was too late. There was no way that they would be able to outrun the beasts, not five of them. Not for the first time, Danny wished that Hollywood hadn’t been so very, very wrong when they'd made all of those movies about slow-moving zombies.
“Go!” Steve yelled, glancing back at Danny. “Get Grace out of here.”
“No!” Danny yelled back. “Not without you.”
“Just go! I’ll follow when I can!”
Danny stared at Steve helplessly for a moment before cursing under his breath and taking off down a side street. Steve was right, he had to get Grace to safety, but it went against everything that he was to leave Steve behind.
“What about Uncle Steve?” Grace asked desperately, beginning to cry. “We can’t leave him.”
Grace began clawing at his back, her nails digging in painfully as she tried to squirm free. She was wriggling so much that he had to stop or risk dropping her, so he pulled up and took a deep breath. He made quiet hushing noises and patted her back as he thought.
She was right, of course. He'd never forgive himself if they left Steve, and neither would she. Grace had lost so much already that he didn't know if she could bear losing Steve too. To be honest, he didn't know if he could either. Besides, Steve would never, ever leave them if the situations were reversed.
He looked around, quickly scanning their surroundings, and saw an alcove under a porch that would be nearly hidden from most angles. After a quick inspection, he decided it would be safe enough for a short time and set Grace down. He pulled up his pants leg, took his back-up gun out of his ankle holster, and handed it carefully to Grace. “You remember how to use it?”
She nodded solemnly, keeping the barrel pointed carefully at the ground.
“Good,” Danny said. He pointed under the porch. “You hide in there and if anybody comes besides me or Steve, you shoot them in the head. Do you understand?”
She nodded again and he quickly pressed a kiss to her forehead before running back in the direction they'd come from. He hated leaving her and hated that he'd had to teach her how to shoot, but desperate times called for desperate measures, and so he had taught her how to survive if something happened to him.
As he ran, Danny pulled his gun out of his shoulder holster and made sure it was loaded. He only had a handful of bullets left so he was going to have to make them count.
Danny was filled with dread as he got closer to Steve. He didn't know how long it had been since they had left Steve, but one man against five of those damned beasts was bad odds, even if that man was Steve. Steeling himself for what he would find, he turned the last corner, gun extended in front of him. He was relieved to see Steve was still on his feet, circling two zombies with his bat in hand. The other three zombies were down, their brains smeared across the pavement.
Danny slowed his pace as he walked toward Steve trying to get a clear shot at one of the beasts. "Steve!"
Steve glanced up in surprise at Danny's voice. Danny had intended to let Steve know help had arrived but unfortunately he realized his mistake too late. Steve was only distracted for a second but it was enough for the female zombie to lunge forward and grab his arm. Danny watched in horror as the woman sank her teeth deep into Steve's arm, making him drop the bat.
"No!" Danny yelled. He ran forward, firing his gun at both of the zombies. Before he realized what he was doing, he had emptied his clip into the creatures. He had managed to force them away from Steve but unfortunately none of the bullets had hit their heads so instead of going down, they started to move warily towards Danny.
"You idiot!" Steve exclaimed. He reached down, picked up the bat he'd dropped, and rushed forward, swinging it two-handed. He managed to efficiently crush both zombie skulls in one swing before he winced, dropped the bat and grabbing at his bleeding arm. "We're almost out of ammunition. You shouldn't have wasted it."
"You were bit," Danny explained helplessly.
"Doesn't matter," Steve said. He took off his outer shirt and tied it tightly around his bleeding arm. He looked up suddenly. "Where's Grace?"
"I got her hidden away before I came back," Danny replied numbly as he stared at the blood slowly staining Steve's makeshift bandage.
"You shouldn't have come back." Steve said quietly.
"Leaving you wasn't an option, babe,” Danny said shaking his head. He tore his eyes away from Steve's arm. "How bad is it?"
Steve shrugged. "She bit me. You know as well as I do what that means."
Danny closed his eyes. This was his fault. If only he hadn't yelled out for Steve, distracting him, then--
"Stop that," Steve muttered. "It's not your fault. It just happened."
Danny knew better than to argue with Steve. Now wasn't the time for that. Instead he moved forward and took hold of Steve's good arm. "Come on. We should get back to Grace."
Steve pulled back, breaking Danny's grip and stared at Danny like he was crazy. "Danny, did you miss the part where I was bit?"
Danny met Steve's eyes with a determined gaze and reached out, taking Steve's wrist. "Did you miss the part where leaving you wasn't an option?"
"But--"
Danny pulled Steve down into a fierce kiss. "No buts."
**
Danny slipped out of the cellar, intending to retrieve some supplies from the kitchen.
"Danno?" Grace asked quietly from the couch as he passed through the living room. "Is Uncle Steve going to be okay?"
Danny sighed and sat down next to Grace. He hadn't let her go in to see Steve since they had made it back to the relative safety of Steve's house three days ago. Thankfully, the worst of Steve’s fever hadn't hit until they were nearly home. Danny had all but carried Steve the last several blocks when he'd become delirious and non-responsive but they had made it. Steve’s condition had forced Danny to lock him in the cellar just in case he lost his battle with the virus. He had faith in Steve but he still had to protect Grace. "I hope so, Monkey."
"But when Tommy's dad got bit..." Grace trailed off and stared at her feet.
"Hey," Danny said wrapping his arm around her shoulder and pulling her close. "Steve is the strongest person I know. And besides, before the news went dark there was a story about a man in Atlanta who fought it off and a woman in New York. If they can do it, then he can too."
"What if he doesn't?" Grace asked, her voice trembling.
"We can't think like that," Danny said firmly. "Steve is sick and we have to be strong for him until he gets better. Do you think you can be strong for him?"
Grace nodded and wiped fiercely at her eyes. "I can be strong just like Uncle Steve."
"I know you can." Danny squeezed her gently.
"Danno?" she asked quietly. "Can I help take care of him? It's my fault that he's sick and--"
"Hey," Danny interrupted. "None of that. It's not your fault that he's sick. You didn't do anything wrong."
She frowned at him. "I still want to help."
"And you can," Danny said. "You can help gather the first aid supplies and wash the bandages and--"
"But I want to see him," she insisted.
"Grace, I'm sorry but you can't see him until he's better," he told her firmly. "Now why don't you go find a book for us to read after I check on Steve?"
Grace glared at him but did as she was told, getting up to search Steve's bookshelves for something worth reading. Most of the books weren't appropriate for children, but Danny wanted to keep her mind active. If the only options were Steve's military strategy books or Mary's Harlequin romance novels, well, Grace would be an expert in troop deployment in no time.
He watched her for a moment before standing up to get some fresh water and a clean cloth from the kitchen. When he got into the cellar, Steve was tossing and turning on the pallet Danny had set up for him. Danny sat down next to him and took the washcloth, dipped it into the bowl of cool water, and gently wiped at Steve's brow. "Shhh. It's okay. You're okay."
Still sleeping, Steve reached out toward Danny's voice and Danny took Steve's hand in his own. He didn't know if it was his touch or the cool cloth, but Steve calmed and relaxed into a deeper sleep. Danny set the cloth aside and studied Steve's face. It had been three days and Steve was still fighting. Chin had succumbed to the virus after one day and Kono after two.
Danny didn't like to think about Chin and Kono. They had been lost in the early days of the epidemic, before they had disbanded the task force. Everyone had been so hopeful that they could help maintain order until a cure was found, but it had been a lost cause. Chin had gone first, bitten while he tried to help evacuate the hospital. Kono had seen it happen and had flown into a rage trying to reach him. She had taken out three of the beasts but had been bitten in the process. Steve and Danny had sat by their sides hoping that they would be able to fight the infection, but once they had changed, Steve did what had been necessary to put them out of their misery. He'd insisted that the burden was his as the leader of the task force, refusing to let Danny share the weight.
Danny gently squeezed Steve's hand. Steve had to get better because Danny didn't know if he was strong enough to look into Steve's eyes and pull the trigger. And he knew he wasn't strong enough to keep going on his own.
**
He was hungry. So bone deep hungry that he couldn't think of anything else. The hunger took over all that he was, all that he had ever been, and all that he would be. It reached into his soul and ripped it out until there was nothing left but a mindless desire to consume. He moved forward, trying to find something, anything, to sate the hunger.
Steve jerked awake, disoriented. He forced his eyes open and was met with darkness. He tried to sit up, but as soon as he lifted his head, he felt dizzy and he fell back against the pillow. Pillow. There was a pillow. That was a good sign. He wasn't sure where he was, but he'd never known a kidnapper to give out luxuries like pillows.
He strained his brain and tried to remember what had happened. He reached up with his hand to rub at his temple which made his arm throb painfully. The ache in his arm brought back a rush of memories. They had been running and then there had been five zombies. And then he'd been bit. He didn't remember much after that, just that Danny and Grace had been there and they had run. After that, his memory got hazy, just a vague feeling of strong arms wrapped around him and whispered assurances.
"Danny?" he croaked. His throat was too dry to yell, but Danny must have been close, because Steve heard a door open almost immediately.
"Hey," Danny said, flipping on the lights. "How are you feeling?"
Steve groaned as the lights pierced his eyes, making his head ache. "Thirsty."
Danny left for a moment and returned to kneel at his side with a bottle of water. Danny carefully wrapped his arm around Steve's shoulders and helped him lean forward enough to sip from the bottle. Steve had trouble swallowing and even with Danny's help most of the water dribbled out of his mouth and down his chin, but he was grateful for the little bit that managed to slide down his swollen throat.
"There you go," Danny said, setting the bottle aside. "I'll give you more in a minute. Lemme just check your arm first."
Steve looked away as Danny unwound the cloth around his arm and changed the bandage. "How long?"
"Five days," Danny said, grinning at him. "You've made it five days, babe."
Steve couldn't force himself to return Danny's smile. Five days was longer than anyone else they'd heard of but that didn't mean anything. The bone deep hunger of the dream was still fresh in his mind and he wasn't under any illusions that he would survive this. "Danny," he said softly. "You shouldn't have waited this long. It'll only be harder the longer you wait."
Danny frowned at him but didn't say anything until he finished re-wrapping Steve’s arm. Once he was done, he laid the back of his hand against Steve's forehead. "The fever's almost gone. You are going to be fine. Now, are you hungry? We don't have a lot but there are some nice--"
"No!" Steve yelled as loudly as he could with his raw throat. The idea of food, of eating, made something dark wake up inside him and he didn't trust himself.
"You need to eat something," Danny said.
"I will, just not now. My stomach is upset," Steve said. It wasn't exactly a lie. His stomach was upset, but he knew it was from hunger, not nausea.
"Okay no food," Danny agreed. "But I'll bring down some tea for your stomach and maybe a few crackers. Does that sound okay?"
Steve nodded. Tea and crackers should be safe.
**
The next day, Steve watched as Danny bustled around the cellar re-organizing the canned goods that he’d already alphabetized once before. He let his eyes follow Danny, trying to remember every detail. If he was going to die, he wanted Danny to be there at the end. It was selfish, he knew that, but he wanted to be near Danny for as long as he could.
Steve sighed and tried to clear his thoughts. Thinking like that was only going to make it harder.
“Why the long face?” Danny asked, turning around at Steve’s sigh.
“A zombie apocalypse isn’t enough of a reason?” Steve asked, trying for levity.
Danny rolled his eyes and came over to sit next to Steve. He reached out and squeezed Steve’s thigh fondly, letting his hand linger. “From where I’m sitting, things are looking up. We got Grace and you’re getting better and—what? What’s that face?”
“Danny," Steve said quietly. "It's been long enough. You have to kill me before it’s too late."
Danny shook his head firmly. “No, I won’t do it. You’re crazier than I thought if you think I would ever--”
“You have to,” Steve interrupted. He struggled to sit up, trying and failing until Danny reached out and cupped his elbow with a strong hand and helped him lean against the wall. He took a deep breath. “Think about Grace.”
“I am,” Danny said gently as he carefully unwound the makeshift bandage on Steve’s forearm and inspected the wound. “It looks like it’s healing.”
Steve refused to look. Danny wanted to think that he was healing, that he would be okay, but Steve knew better. “Please,” he gasped, wincing as Danny re-wrapped the bandage tightly. He reached out and grabbed Danny’s arm. “Danny, please. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“You won’t,” Danny said confidently.
Steve shook his head. “You can’t know that.”
“Steve, I know you,” Danny said simply. “And there is no way I’m going to kill you.”
"You don't understand!" Steve yelled desperately.
“What don’t I understand?” Danny asked, concerned.
Steve looked away. He didn’t want to tell Danny, but he needed him to understand. "I dream about it."
"It?" Danny asked.
"The hunger," Steve explained, refusing to meet Danny's eyes. "Every night it's worse. All I want to do is eat, but not like a normal person. Like one of them."
Danny took Steve's hand in his own. "But it's only in your dreams right, babe?"
"Yes, no, I don't know." He slid down the wall until he was leaning against Danny. "There's something different. Damn it, Danny, it scares me. Do you understand that?"
Danny shifted around so that he could put an arm around Steve's shoulders. "Yeah, I get it, but Steve, you survived this. Your arm is almost healed and I think that if you would just eat something besides crackers--wait a minute." Danny turned his head to study Steve's eyes. "Are you not eating because of the dreams?"
Steve shrugged and looked away.
"Steve, you have to eat something," Danny insisted, pulling away. "I'm going to go make you something. I'm sure you'll feel better after."
Danny stood up and left the room. Steve waited to make sure he was really gone before he lifted his shaking hand to study Danny's gun. He felt a little guilty for stealing the gun while Danny had tried to comfort him, but if Danny couldn't do this then he would. He would take this burden onto himself to save Danny the pain the same way he had with Chin and Kono.
**
Danny opened a can of tuna and carefully spooned the contents onto a plate next to some crackers. He was glad that they still had enough food even though he'd had to leave the supply bag behind on their last, ill-fated trip out. Unfortunately, they didn’t have any mayo to make an actual tuna salad; everything that required refrigeration had long since spoiled, but the tuna would be protein.
Steve was wasting away and Danny hated watching it. It had only been a week but already Steve’s hard muscle was disappearing. And worse than that was Steve’s emotional state. Danny didn’t know how much longer he could keep smiling in the face of Steve’s depression.
He felt a burning in his eyes and leaned against the counter breathing deeply. Steve was better. Danny knew he was better. He just wished that he could convince Steve of it.
“Daddy?” Grace asked from behind him. “Are you okay?”
Danny straightened and pressed the heels of his hands to his eyes, rubbing fiercely before he turned around. “Yeah, Monkey, I’m fine. I was just fixing Steve some dinner.”
“Can I take it to him?” Grace asked, coming over to look at the plate of food. “You said that I could see him when he was better.”
Danny began opening a can of cut pineapple to avoid having to answer immediately. Steve wasn’t in a good place right now, but maybe seeing Grace would help. In fact, Steve would probably be more willing to eat if Grace were watching. It was worth a try at least. He put a scoop of pineapple onto the plate and handed it to Grace. “I think that’s a good idea. You can take him his dinner.”
“Okay,” she said excitedly.
He watched her leave the room before turning around to clean up. He had only managed to wash the spoon when he heard Grace scream.
**
Steve put the safety back on the gun and shoved it behind his back. “Shhh…it’s okay, Grace. I’m sorry.”
Grace stopped screaming but was still crying softly. She fell to her knees and picked up the plate she'd dropped, scooping the spilled crackers off of the floor. “Daddy said I could bring you dinner. He said you were better.”
Steve tried to get up and go to her but he was too weak to stand. He had been so close. Another minute more and she would have found his body. He banged his head against the wall. “Gracie, I’m so sorry.”
“What’s going on?” Danny yelled, running into the room. “Grace, are you okay? What happened?”
Grace shook her head and thrust the plate of food into his hands before running out of the room.
Danny turned to Steve. “What happened?”
“I…” Steve started. He closed his eyes and pulled the gun out from behind his back. No matter what happened he knew he couldn’t use it. Not now. Not after he’d seen the look of terrified horror on Grace’s face.
“What? Is that--Steve. What are you doing with my gun?” Danny asked in a cold voice.
Steve sighed. “I was going to do what you couldn’t, but Grace interrupted me.”
“Damn it!” Danny yelled and Steve heard a loud thud. He opened his eyes and watched as Danny clutched his hand to his chest, a long crack in the door where he had hit it. “When are you going to get it through your head that you’re okay?”
Danny marched across the room, knelt down, and roughly grabbed Steve’s injured arm. He pulled it out and tore off the bandages. Steve winced at the rough treatment and closed his eyes.
“Oh no you don’t!” Danny growled. He shook Steve’s arm. “Look at it. Or are you too much of a coward?”
Steve’s eyes snapped open at the taunt. He wasn’t a coward. He’d never been a coward and the fact that Danny would call him that made him angry. Steve glared at Danny before he lowered his eyes to his arm, steeling himself to see the same oozing blackness that had devoured Chin and Kono’s wounds. Instead he saw healthy pink skin. It wasn’t healed yet, but Danny was right, it was healing.
“Do you see?” Danny asked softly.
Steve nodded mutely, staring at his arm. He reached out with his free hand and gently pressed at the edge of the wound. He really was going to be okay. “I’m going to be okay?” he asked in wonder.
Danny let go of his arm and cupped Steve’s head, pulling him close. “Yes.”
Steve let himself collapse against Danny, burrowing his head into the crook of Danny’s neck. “But what about the dreams? They felt so real.”
“I don’t know,” Danny said hugging Steve close to him. “They might just have been your fear or they might have been real. But either way, you’re okay now. Do you understand? And if you ever try to leave me again—“
Danny’s voice caught and he stopped talking, instead pressing several kisses to the top of Steve’s head.
“I won’t,” Steve promised kissing Danny’s neck. He couldn’t believe he’d almost killed himself and left Danny and Grace for no reason. If Grace hadn’t come in—Steve jerked his head up. “Grace! She saw me with the gun in my mouth.”
“I need to go talk to her.” Danny pulled away and stood up. He picked up the gun and looked at Steve. “You aren’t going to—“
“No,” Steve said firmly.
“Good,” Danny said. “But Steve, I just want you to know that if you ever do something that stupid again…if you ever scare Grace like that again…”
“I know,” Steve said.
Steve watched Danny leave the room before picking up the abandoned plate of food and forcing himself to eat a bite of tuna. If he wanted to get out of this cellar he was going to have to get his strength back. He had managed to eat half of the food on the plate when he heard quiet footsteps and looked up to find Grace peeking hesitantly around the side of the door.
“Hey,” he said softly.
She looked at him for a moment before entering the room and sitting down next to him. “Danno said you were so sick you weren’t thinking right.”
“He’s right,” Steve said. “Gracie, I’m so sorry you saw that.”
“Are you thinking right now?” she asked.
“Yeah,” he replied. “Yeah, I am. What you saw is never going to happen again.”
“Good,” Grace said. She lunged forward and threw her arms around him. “Because I don’t want you to go away like Mommy and Stan and Chin and Kono.”
Steve wrapped his arms around her and rested his chin on her forehead. He looked up at the door and saw Danny standing there watching. “I’m not going anywhere. Danno and I aren’t going anywhere.”
“Okay, Monkey,” Danny said. “It’s time for you to get ready for bed. I’ll be up to read to you in a minute.”
Grace pulled away and kissed Steve’s forehead before she left the room. Steve watched her leave before looking up at Danny.
“So,” Danny said. “I was wondering if you wanted to come to bed tonight?”
“You’ll have to help me,” Steve said, ashamed of his weakness. He felt stronger after having eaten but still didn’t think he could walk on his own.
“Always.” Danny walked over and pulled Steve to his feet. He slung Steve’s arm over his shoulder and started moving slowly toward the door.
Steve was exhausted by the time they had finally made it up the two flights of stairs. He collapsed gratefully onto the bed while Danny went to read to Grace. He must have dozed off because when he woke up Danny was in bed next to him, one arm wrapped tightly around his waist.
Steve rolled over and saw that Danny was still wide awake. “Hey.”
Danny leaned forward and kissed him gently. “Hey.”
“Is Grace okay?” Steve asked.
“As well as she can be,” Danny replied. “She’s lost so much and seen so much. I keep waiting for the day when it’s all too much for her, but she’s strong.”
“She takes after you,” Steve said.
Danny shook his head. “I’m not that strong.”
“Yeah you are,” Steve said. “You came back for me and you believed in me when I didn’t.”
“I had to,” Danny said. “I can’t do this without you. Besides, I know you, and you are one stubborn SOB. There is no way you were going to let a little zombie bite get the better of you.”
Steve smiled and leaned in for another kiss. “Thank you.”
Danny kissed him, letting his lips linger a moment. “If you really want to thank me you’ll take a bath tomorrow. You stink.”
Steve laughed. “Noted.”
“Now go to sleep,” Danny ordered. “You need your rest.”
“Yes, sir,” Steve said rolling back over and closing his eyes. He felt Danny shift closer to him, pressing his warm body against Steve’s back. As Steve drifted off he could almost forget all of the bad things. He'd lost so much, they all had, but they still had each other. He didn’t know what tomorrow would hold, but right now, in this moment, things were good.
