H50 Fic - Guarding the Ledge
Feb. 22nd, 2011 12:11 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
shinysylverTitle: Guarding the Ledge
Pairing: gen
Word Count: 852
Rating: R for a bit of language
Spoilers: heavy spoilers for 1x18
Disclaimer: I don't own Hawaii Five-0.
Summary: Danny is wrecked after the events of 1x18 but Steve is there. Episode tag to 1x18.
Warning: none
Author's Note: I couldn't go to sleep until I fixed it. It's a bit of a quick job but I needed to fix it ASAP.
Danny leaned his head back against the headrest and stared blankly at the house in front of him. He wasn’t sure why he’d come to Rachel’s. He’d gotten numbly into his car at the airfield and just started driving. Before he’d had time to think about it he had been standing on Rachel’s front porch.
It’s not that he regretted coming to Rachel’s, not exactly. It was good to share his pain with someone who knew Matt too, someone who cared about him as much as anyone else in Hawaii could. But now he just felt lonelier. Rachel had invited him in but he knew that he couldn’t accept. The situation was too complicated. And he definitely wasn’t ready to explain to Grace that she wouldn’t be seeing her uncle again for a long time if ever.
So instead he was sitting in Rachel’s driveway trying to get up the will to drive home. His empty shithole of an apartment held no appeal at the moment but he couldn’t stay in his car all night. With a sigh, he turned the key and began the long drive back to the wrong side of the tracks.
Danny just didn’t understand how Matt could do it. How could he have been so wrong about his kid brother? He didn’t care about the white collar Wall Street crap but the fact that his brother was willing to launder money for a Columbian drug lord was another story. In Danny’s mind that made him accessory to every murder that was committed to get that money. Surely his brother was better than that? Danny half heartedly punched the steering wheel. If only he hadn’t left him alone that afternoon. He should have just driven him directly to the airport and drug his ass back to New York.
By the time he finally reached his apartment Danny was surprised to see Steve’s truck parked outside. He pulled his car in next to it and walked around to the open driver’s side window. Steve appeared to be taking a nap.
“Hey, Sleeping Beauty.” Danny said, poking at Steve’s arm. “What’re you doing here?”
Steve opened his eyes lazily and pointed to the brown paper bag on the seat beside him. “Brought some beer.”
“Well come on then.” Danny said gruffly, trying to reign in the emotions that were bubbling so close to the surface.
Steve grabbed the bag and they made their way into the apartment. For once Steve didn’t make any smart comments about the décor. In fact he didn’t say anything at all. He wordlessly got beers for both of them and settled into a seat at the table.
Danny got the impression that Steve was patiently waiting for him to say something but he didn’t even know where to start. How did you explain to your partner that he had lied to the fucking FBI for your worthless brother and it had all been for nothing? How did you tell someone who had spent much of his life tracking down international drug lords and terrorists that your brother was working for one? So instead of talking Danny drank in silence.
Finally, after drinking three beers while Steve watched him patiently, Danny couldn’t hold it in any longer. “It’s all my fault!”
“It’s not your fault.” Steve said firmly, setting down his beer. “How could it be?”
Danny sighed and gripped his bottle tighter. “Maybe if I had been back in Jersey--”
“Then you wouldn’t have been here for Grace.” Steve interrupted. “That was never an option.”
“Well, if I had believed the feds sooner,” Danny tried. “Maybe I could have stopped it.”
“Danny,” Steve said gently. “Matt is your brother you’re supposed to believe in him.”
“But I shouldn’t have!” Danny yelled gesturing wildly with the bottle.
Steve shrugged. “It seems to me you did everything you could. He’s a grown man. It’s no one’s fault but his own.”
“Well what about you?” Danny asked.
Steve raised an eyebrow. “What about me?”
“You lied to the fucking feds for me.” Danny said. “Surely that’s my fault.”
“You’d have done the same for me.” Steve said with a shrug.
Danny didn’t have a retort for that because he knew it was true. He would lie to the Governor herself if Steve needed him to. Hell, he’d probably lie to the Pope for Steve. He set the bottle down and rubbed fiercely at the prickle in his eyes. He didn’t know when he’d become so tangled up in grey. Things had been so much more black and white before he’d met Steve McGarrett.
He looked up at Steve meeting his eyes. “I would.”
“There you have it.” Steve said. “There was nothing you could have done.”
Danny didn’t completely believe Steve, he still felt guilty, but knowing that Steve didn’t hold it against him helped a little. Having Steve here, just knowing that he wasn’t alone, helped a lot. And Danny had a feeling that tomorrow night Steve would be at his door with another case of beer. After all, that’s what family was supposed to do.
Pairing: gen
Word Count: 852
Rating: R for a bit of language
Spoilers: heavy spoilers for 1x18
Disclaimer: I don't own Hawaii Five-0.
Summary: Danny is wrecked after the events of 1x18 but Steve is there. Episode tag to 1x18.
Warning: none
Author's Note: I couldn't go to sleep until I fixed it. It's a bit of a quick job but I needed to fix it ASAP.
Danny leaned his head back against the headrest and stared blankly at the house in front of him. He wasn’t sure why he’d come to Rachel’s. He’d gotten numbly into his car at the airfield and just started driving. Before he’d had time to think about it he had been standing on Rachel’s front porch.
It’s not that he regretted coming to Rachel’s, not exactly. It was good to share his pain with someone who knew Matt too, someone who cared about him as much as anyone else in Hawaii could. But now he just felt lonelier. Rachel had invited him in but he knew that he couldn’t accept. The situation was too complicated. And he definitely wasn’t ready to explain to Grace that she wouldn’t be seeing her uncle again for a long time if ever.
So instead he was sitting in Rachel’s driveway trying to get up the will to drive home. His empty shithole of an apartment held no appeal at the moment but he couldn’t stay in his car all night. With a sigh, he turned the key and began the long drive back to the wrong side of the tracks.
Danny just didn’t understand how Matt could do it. How could he have been so wrong about his kid brother? He didn’t care about the white collar Wall Street crap but the fact that his brother was willing to launder money for a Columbian drug lord was another story. In Danny’s mind that made him accessory to every murder that was committed to get that money. Surely his brother was better than that? Danny half heartedly punched the steering wheel. If only he hadn’t left him alone that afternoon. He should have just driven him directly to the airport and drug his ass back to New York.
By the time he finally reached his apartment Danny was surprised to see Steve’s truck parked outside. He pulled his car in next to it and walked around to the open driver’s side window. Steve appeared to be taking a nap.
“Hey, Sleeping Beauty.” Danny said, poking at Steve’s arm. “What’re you doing here?”
Steve opened his eyes lazily and pointed to the brown paper bag on the seat beside him. “Brought some beer.”
“Well come on then.” Danny said gruffly, trying to reign in the emotions that were bubbling so close to the surface.
Steve grabbed the bag and they made their way into the apartment. For once Steve didn’t make any smart comments about the décor. In fact he didn’t say anything at all. He wordlessly got beers for both of them and settled into a seat at the table.
Danny got the impression that Steve was patiently waiting for him to say something but he didn’t even know where to start. How did you explain to your partner that he had lied to the fucking FBI for your worthless brother and it had all been for nothing? How did you tell someone who had spent much of his life tracking down international drug lords and terrorists that your brother was working for one? So instead of talking Danny drank in silence.
Finally, after drinking three beers while Steve watched him patiently, Danny couldn’t hold it in any longer. “It’s all my fault!”
“It’s not your fault.” Steve said firmly, setting down his beer. “How could it be?”
Danny sighed and gripped his bottle tighter. “Maybe if I had been back in Jersey--”
“Then you wouldn’t have been here for Grace.” Steve interrupted. “That was never an option.”
“Well, if I had believed the feds sooner,” Danny tried. “Maybe I could have stopped it.”
“Danny,” Steve said gently. “Matt is your brother you’re supposed to believe in him.”
“But I shouldn’t have!” Danny yelled gesturing wildly with the bottle.
Steve shrugged. “It seems to me you did everything you could. He’s a grown man. It’s no one’s fault but his own.”
“Well what about you?” Danny asked.
Steve raised an eyebrow. “What about me?”
“You lied to the fucking feds for me.” Danny said. “Surely that’s my fault.”
“You’d have done the same for me.” Steve said with a shrug.
Danny didn’t have a retort for that because he knew it was true. He would lie to the Governor herself if Steve needed him to. Hell, he’d probably lie to the Pope for Steve. He set the bottle down and rubbed fiercely at the prickle in his eyes. He didn’t know when he’d become so tangled up in grey. Things had been so much more black and white before he’d met Steve McGarrett.
He looked up at Steve meeting his eyes. “I would.”
“There you have it.” Steve said. “There was nothing you could have done.”
Danny didn’t completely believe Steve, he still felt guilty, but knowing that Steve didn’t hold it against him helped a little. Having Steve here, just knowing that he wasn’t alone, helped a lot. And Danny had a feeling that tomorrow night Steve would be at his door with another case of beer. After all, that’s what family was supposed to do.
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no subject
Date: 2011-02-22 06:17 am (UTC)I'm avoiding slash comms right now, because I don't want the negativity I'm SURE is being flung about there. He went to Rachel, the mother of his child, because he needed to connect with his family. And yes, Steve, Chin and Kono are family, but Rachel and Grace were the ones who knew Matt.
no subject
Date: 2011-02-22 06:27 am (UTC)Yeah, I didn't love that the episode went there because I just can't see it as anything other than a step toward reconciliation but as far as Danny's character I completely understand why he would.
I agree with all of the reasons you said but would also point out that it is probably much easier for him to open up emotionally to a woman in general and Rachel in particular than it would be with a man.
But I wanted my symmetry so damn it I was going to write it! ;)
no subject
Date: 2011-02-22 06:38 am (UTC)I'ma wait and see. This added to Stan's troubles might a step towards reconciciation, as you say, but I'm prepaered to give the show the benefit of the doubt. They know where a chunk of the fanbase is - this might be nothing more than a tease for any Rachel/Danny shippers out there ;-)
Symmetry is VERY good ;-)
no subject
Date: 2011-02-22 06:45 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-22 06:29 am (UTC)Thanks for sharing it!
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Date: 2011-02-22 06:46 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-22 06:42 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-22 06:48 am (UTC)I can't imagine anyone bashing Rachel -- in my mind, she drove him to Steve's. :)
That is a lovely thought.
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Date: 2011-02-22 06:59 am (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2011-02-23 05:48 am (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2011-02-23 05:49 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-23 02:33 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-23 05:50 am (UTC)Thanks for reading and reviewing!
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Date: 2011-02-23 05:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-23 05:50 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-23 02:18 pm (UTC)This was such a beautiful expression.
I liked this, very bittersweer. Great job!
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Date: 2011-02-23 03:18 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-23 03:44 pm (UTC)Good job.
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Date: 2011-02-23 03:46 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-02-26 11:24 pm (UTC)thanks for sharing :)
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Date: 2011-02-26 11:26 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-03-22 12:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-03-22 01:50 pm (UTC)It's the way I thought it had to happen. The episode was just too short to get there.
no subject
Date: 2011-07-20 12:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-07-20 02:02 pm (UTC)