H50 Fic - Letting Go (Steve/Danny)
Feb. 10th, 2011 01:21 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
shinysylverTitle: Letting Go
Pairing: Steve/Danny
Word Count: 1136
Rating: R.
Disclaimer: I don't own Hawaii Five-0.
Summary: Danny realizes that sometimes you just have to let go.
Warning: none
Author's Note: This fic is an immediate follow-up to Cinders and you should probably read it first to understand what is going on.
Author's Note: This is for my H50 prompt table in the![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
h50_50 Community. The prompt was EMPTY. My prompt table can be found here: Sensational Sensations. I seem to have come up with the bright idea to connect some or all of the fic I write for this table into one big ‘Verse. I have several stories planned out at the moment but they won’t necessarily be written or posted in chronological order. If you want to see the order they go in I am keeping track here.
Danny sat in his office and stared blankly at the form in front of him. He had been staring at it for the past hour, gripped by indecision. He was tempted to wait until tomorrow but he already knew what he was going to do. It was just actually doing it that was the problem. With a sigh, he picked up a pen and began filling out the extended leave request.
He didn’t want to take a leave of absence but he needed to. When he and Steve had gotten involved he had been concerned that it would affect their working relationship but he had still jumped in head first. Now after what happened on that damned beach he knew that things had gotten screwed up. He had gotten screwed up.
It would be easy to blame Steve for everything. Steve was the one hell-bent on revenge, damn the consequences, but there was so much more to it than that. Danny was ashamed of himself. He was ashamed of the way he had acted, of the violence. That wasn’t the way a relationship was supposed to be. It wasn’t the way he wanted to be. Danny was not the type of person to hit someone he cared about, let alone use sex the way he had. Sure he might run off at the mouth and yell a bit, but he didn’t ever want to be the kind of person who brought violence into a relationship.
Danny had let all of his hurt, anger, and worry turn into something darker. His expectations had been too high, after all he had known who Steve was when they got involved and it was his own damn fault that what Steve could offer wasn’t enough. He needed to step back, clear his head and get a grip on things. Then he could come back and deal with Steve.
The only reason he was even hesitating was that he felt guilty leaving Steve to deal with Wo Fat on his own. But if Steve wasn’t going to listen to his input or respect his opinion then what could he do? Sit back and watch Steve self destruct? No thank you.
With a sigh, Danny finished filling out the form and gathered his things together. It was late and everyone else was gone, well everyone except for Steve who never seemed to go home anymore. He spent all his free time looking at those damn pictures from his father’s toolbox. Danny was tempted to go check on him, maybe bring him something to eat like he usually did, but he knew that it would only make things harder. His mind made up, Danny avoided the command center and instead slipped quietly into Steve’s office. He set the papers in Steve’s inbox and left quickly, before he could change his mind.
***
“Danno!” Grace called excitedly running to hug him.
“Hey, Monkey.” Danny enveloped her in his arms smiling for the first time in days. When he was holding her he felt less empty inside, not quite as painfully hollow. “All ready? Where’s your suitcase?”
She nodded excitedly and pointed toward the driver who was holding her bright pink Hello Kitty suitcase. Danny usually hated that Rachel sent Grace places with just a driver to babysit but today he was relieved not to see her or Stan. He had had to do a lot of begging to get Rachel to let him take Grace back to New Jersey for her entire Christmas vacation, including both the Christmas and New Year’s holidays. In exchange he had agreed to Rachel’s request for a two week vacation with Stan’s family in July and Christmas in London next year.
He set Grace down gently and retrieved the suitcase from the driver. Danny took one last look around, part of him hoping that Steve would show up. He had been surprised that Steve had signed off on the leave request without saying a word. If Danny had had any lingering doubts about whether or not he should leave that had quieted them. If Steve wasn’t even going to say a fucking word to him about a three week leave request then there wasn’t anything left to salvage. But that didn’t mean that part of him didn’t hope Steve would come to his senses and at least come to see them off.
With a dejected sigh, he grabbed his own suitcase and they began to make their way into the airport. Forcing himself to be cheerful, he turned to Grace and asked, “Are you excited to see your Nana?”
“Yes,” Grace said nodding excitedly, “and Ralph.”
Danny smiled. “I’m sure Ralph is looking very forward to seeing you, too.”
“You don’t think he’s forgotten me?” Grace asked, suddenly worried. “He might not recognize me, I’m a lot bigger now.”
“Dogs have very good memories.” Danny reassured her. “They remember you by your smell, no matter how big you get.”
“Oh good,” she said, her grin returning.
As they made their way from check-in, to security, to their gate Grace chattered away about school and her friends. She talked excitedly about the new winter coat Stan had ordered for her special for this trip--which made Danny grind his teeth--and the necklace Rachel had given her for Christmas. She relayed all of the adventures Dolphin Trainer Annie had been going on and how Mr. Hoppy had almost escaped when she took him into the back yard.
Danny began to feel lighter with each step they took, just being with Grace helped. Listening to her stories, seeing her smiles, it all helped fill the hole in his chest. Not perfectly, he still felt raw, but he knew he was doing the right thing. Taking this time with Grace, seeing his family, getting off of this blasted island, it was the only thing he could do.
“Danno?” Grace asked a bit hesitantly as they sat in the waiting area.
“Yes, Monkey?”
“Why isn’t Uncle Steve coming?” She asked quietly. “You said we were going to spend Christmas at his house this year. If we aren’t there won’t he be lonely?”
“Uncle Steve is very busy.” Danny said carefully. “I’m sure he’ll miss you but he has a lot to do right now.”
“Okay,” Grace said looking at him with eyes much older and wiser than a nine year old should have. “I’m sure he’ll miss you too, Danno.”
Danny didn’t say anything, didn’t trust himself to say anything, and was relieved to hear the boarding call come just a few moments later. He didn’t think Steve would miss him. Part of him wondered if Steve would even notice his absence. And as much as it hurt he had to let go because he couldn’t keep going on this way.
Pairing: Steve/Danny
Word Count: 1136
Rating: R.
Disclaimer: I don't own Hawaii Five-0.
Summary: Danny realizes that sometimes you just have to let go.
Warning: none
Author's Note: This fic is an immediate follow-up to Cinders and you should probably read it first to understand what is going on.
Author's Note: This is for my H50 prompt table in the
h50_50 Community. The prompt was EMPTY. My prompt table can be found here: Sensational Sensations. I seem to have come up with the bright idea to connect some or all of the fic I write for this table into one big ‘Verse. I have several stories planned out at the moment but they won’t necessarily be written or posted in chronological order. If you want to see the order they go in I am keeping track here.Danny sat in his office and stared blankly at the form in front of him. He had been staring at it for the past hour, gripped by indecision. He was tempted to wait until tomorrow but he already knew what he was going to do. It was just actually doing it that was the problem. With a sigh, he picked up a pen and began filling out the extended leave request.
He didn’t want to take a leave of absence but he needed to. When he and Steve had gotten involved he had been concerned that it would affect their working relationship but he had still jumped in head first. Now after what happened on that damned beach he knew that things had gotten screwed up. He had gotten screwed up.
It would be easy to blame Steve for everything. Steve was the one hell-bent on revenge, damn the consequences, but there was so much more to it than that. Danny was ashamed of himself. He was ashamed of the way he had acted, of the violence. That wasn’t the way a relationship was supposed to be. It wasn’t the way he wanted to be. Danny was not the type of person to hit someone he cared about, let alone use sex the way he had. Sure he might run off at the mouth and yell a bit, but he didn’t ever want to be the kind of person who brought violence into a relationship.
Danny had let all of his hurt, anger, and worry turn into something darker. His expectations had been too high, after all he had known who Steve was when they got involved and it was his own damn fault that what Steve could offer wasn’t enough. He needed to step back, clear his head and get a grip on things. Then he could come back and deal with Steve.
The only reason he was even hesitating was that he felt guilty leaving Steve to deal with Wo Fat on his own. But if Steve wasn’t going to listen to his input or respect his opinion then what could he do? Sit back and watch Steve self destruct? No thank you.
With a sigh, Danny finished filling out the form and gathered his things together. It was late and everyone else was gone, well everyone except for Steve who never seemed to go home anymore. He spent all his free time looking at those damn pictures from his father’s toolbox. Danny was tempted to go check on him, maybe bring him something to eat like he usually did, but he knew that it would only make things harder. His mind made up, Danny avoided the command center and instead slipped quietly into Steve’s office. He set the papers in Steve’s inbox and left quickly, before he could change his mind.
***
“Danno!” Grace called excitedly running to hug him.
“Hey, Monkey.” Danny enveloped her in his arms smiling for the first time in days. When he was holding her he felt less empty inside, not quite as painfully hollow. “All ready? Where’s your suitcase?”
She nodded excitedly and pointed toward the driver who was holding her bright pink Hello Kitty suitcase. Danny usually hated that Rachel sent Grace places with just a driver to babysit but today he was relieved not to see her or Stan. He had had to do a lot of begging to get Rachel to let him take Grace back to New Jersey for her entire Christmas vacation, including both the Christmas and New Year’s holidays. In exchange he had agreed to Rachel’s request for a two week vacation with Stan’s family in July and Christmas in London next year.
He set Grace down gently and retrieved the suitcase from the driver. Danny took one last look around, part of him hoping that Steve would show up. He had been surprised that Steve had signed off on the leave request without saying a word. If Danny had had any lingering doubts about whether or not he should leave that had quieted them. If Steve wasn’t even going to say a fucking word to him about a three week leave request then there wasn’t anything left to salvage. But that didn’t mean that part of him didn’t hope Steve would come to his senses and at least come to see them off.
With a dejected sigh, he grabbed his own suitcase and they began to make their way into the airport. Forcing himself to be cheerful, he turned to Grace and asked, “Are you excited to see your Nana?”
“Yes,” Grace said nodding excitedly, “and Ralph.”
Danny smiled. “I’m sure Ralph is looking very forward to seeing you, too.”
“You don’t think he’s forgotten me?” Grace asked, suddenly worried. “He might not recognize me, I’m a lot bigger now.”
“Dogs have very good memories.” Danny reassured her. “They remember you by your smell, no matter how big you get.”
“Oh good,” she said, her grin returning.
As they made their way from check-in, to security, to their gate Grace chattered away about school and her friends. She talked excitedly about the new winter coat Stan had ordered for her special for this trip--which made Danny grind his teeth--and the necklace Rachel had given her for Christmas. She relayed all of the adventures Dolphin Trainer Annie had been going on and how Mr. Hoppy had almost escaped when she took him into the back yard.
Danny began to feel lighter with each step they took, just being with Grace helped. Listening to her stories, seeing her smiles, it all helped fill the hole in his chest. Not perfectly, he still felt raw, but he knew he was doing the right thing. Taking this time with Grace, seeing his family, getting off of this blasted island, it was the only thing he could do.
“Danno?” Grace asked a bit hesitantly as they sat in the waiting area.
“Yes, Monkey?”
“Why isn’t Uncle Steve coming?” She asked quietly. “You said we were going to spend Christmas at his house this year. If we aren’t there won’t he be lonely?”
“Uncle Steve is very busy.” Danny said carefully. “I’m sure he’ll miss you but he has a lot to do right now.”
“Okay,” Grace said looking at him with eyes much older and wiser than a nine year old should have. “I’m sure he’ll miss you too, Danno.”
Danny didn’t say anything, didn’t trust himself to say anything, and was relieved to hear the boarding call come just a few moments later. He didn’t think Steve would miss him. Part of him wondered if Steve would even notice his absence. And as much as it hurt he had to let go because he couldn’t keep going on this way.
